I Hate To Forgive! Why Should I?

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Do you hold onto anger and grudges? Or, do you simply sink into depression about all the chaos and pain around you? It is so very difficult to forgive those we feel have wronged us. Why should we even think about forgiving someone else?

Actually, forgiveness best serves those of us who are doing the forgiving. It is one of the final steps to understanding the divine energy within us, and it is an enormous step toward personal freedom. True freedom cannot be attained without forgiveness.

Forgiveness is not a concept that is welcomed in the public domain of the world as we experience it today. Although there are those who find that forgiveness is the only way to let go of grief and trauma, there are others who hold on tightly to grudges, judgments and misunderstandings. For them, forgiveness is either unknown or unused.

Every news medium covers the details of damaging events, exchanges, and circumstances. Whether these concern purposeful despoiling of water, usury in financial transactions, or assaults on our feelings, bodies, or reputations, the effects on us are huge. When warring factions continue ancient feuds regarding religious viewpoints or territorial disputes, our world and its inhabitants are terrorized.

There is a journey to forgiveness. Many times we’ve felt so hurt and betrayed by others that we couldn’t let go long enough to see the bigger picture. We worried that forgiving and forgetting would leave us open to being hurt again. We believed that there were some things that were “unforgivable.”

In our personal lives, we fear the vulnerability of our hurt, and we trap ourselves in a pose of unassailable rightness. These habits and beliefs keep us locked into a “holding grudges” state of being. In many cases, we choose to suffer when we could accept the experience of life and learn to understand why people come into our lives. Perhaps we can truly start fresh again through the exercise of forgiving ourselves and those who appear to harm us.

Long ago through the writing of Carlos Castanedas, we were made aware of the concept of the “petitos tyranitos”—the petty tyrant. From Carlos we learned how others serve as our tyrants. Their presence in our lives, pushing all our buttons, forces us to grow. Carlos encouraged being grateful for the tyrants that move us beyond ourselves and move us beyond our old habits and patterns of being. They allow us to release those old habits and parts of ourselves in order to grow.

We are living in a time of completion where true resolution is available for every limiting habit or belief we’ve ever held onto. Now we have the opportunity to see with new eyes and hear with an open heart. The Light of Brilliance within us stands ready to illuminate what is the truth behind all

appearances. It stands ready to pierce the armor we have created with our limiting beliefs. Brilliance brings love and peace to us in the instant we accept its impulse of connection, understanding, and forgiveness.

It is clear that whether we are the antagonist or the peace-maker, we in fact play both roles for one another to create the space where we are willing to go beyond appearances and truly transform ourselves and our world. The greatest piece of this process for us is the act of forgiving ourselves. Forgiving self allows us to accept a transformation, a transfiguration, where healing and wholeness are born from our pain and suffering.

Forgiveness allows us to truly move beyond all that prevents us from discovering our mastery, our majesty, and our divine humanness.

Lynne Hoft and Vivian Hildebrandt are Reality Upgraders. Contact them for coaching options at their website www.GotoSource.org. To reach Lynne or Vivian, click www.gotosource.org/get-help. To sign up for weekly updates,

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